I'm not sure you understand how private peering works. In fact I know you don't. It's cables back to back between the two networks. There's no 'cheap' arrangement there and Cogent have had a few 'issues' recently.
Regarding Aorta being tier 1 https://bgp.he.net/AS6830#_peers is a who's who: Aorta is tier 1: no-one connects to the networks they do without some serious weight. I'm not a fan of 5089 being put largely behind 6830 but that's how it is.
Not sure why VM don't connect to your ISP directly: lots do - https://bgp.he.net/AS5089#_whois
Who cares about good international routing anyway? Once you get past 3 ms to the real Internet it all breaks down. Not sure how I'm managing with 6 to Manchester and 10 to London but I'm doing my best
Actually, I do know. You have 4 ms of jitter on your home cable. I have zero, I'm on uncapped XGSPON. It's the jitter that's killing you, not a few ms of delay. Pages are blistering for me thanks to good DNS and low jitter. 10 or 20 ms of latency means nothing for browsing as long as it's smooth: our requests aren't all in the same DC our connections meet the wider Internet.
EDIT: Actually while I'm at it let's discuss this, quoting your good self, emphasis mine: 'VM is fine if you're doing netflix and playing games all day. But if you're working from home all day, using realtime protocols such as VoIP, RDP etc. requiring good international (and national) routing, it's a crap connection.'
So: gaming is far more demanding than either VoIP or RDP. VoIP and video calls have buffers, often 50+ ms, gaming doesn't. Gamers are far less tolerant off issues for this reason. RDP I'll take as remote terminal type applications: these are fine over VM. The additional delay means not a lot: Teams screen sharing, Zoom sharing, etc, 10 or 20 ms of delay doesn't mean much, we aren't talking video games with 120 ticks a second, we're talking scenarios where 150 ms latency is tolerated.
If you're using RDP over WAN and not using a work VPN to get there, RDP is open to the Internet, delete your account. If you're using VPN how much latency is the VPN concentrator adding?