I've flagged the noise issue for the forum staff to advise. I would suspect the PSU myself, and they should be able to get you one posted out. There was a bad batch of Hub 3 PSUs a few years back, and it's possible you've got a "reused" Hub rather than a new one - if the original customer didn't notice the noise then its unlikely that it would have been picked up in the "reconditioning" process, that probably involves little more than a hard reset, a wipe with a greasy cloth and a brand new box.
In terms of mesh system, I'm using a TP-Link Deco M4, and found it fabulous. Shop around for the best price, as it can vary quite a bit. You may need to add devices to the QoS table if you want the highest peak speeds at that device, or use it for gaming, but other than that it is a great piece of "fit and forget" equipment. There's plenty of choice if you don't want that - the only things I'd avoid are Amazon/Eero and Google/Nest devices because as you've seen they are often poor value, not to mention the probability of them "phoning home" with your every internet move. The BT Whole Home disks are good, but again pricey, and they don't have a built in router, so you have to keep the hub in router mode. Tenda make some good value kit, TP-LInk are an excellent mid-point, Asus and Netgear are pricey but very competent. The only hardware thing I'd look for is gigabit ethernet ports, because if you buy a cheapo mesh that doesn't have gigabit ports, although it will probably work fine, it'll be constrained to 100 Mbps at the cable connecting it to the hub.
Check your latency with a BQM during your cooling off period. There's quite a few latency related problems across VM's coax networks at the moment, there shouldn't be ANY problems in a new build area, and if there are then I'd suggest you give serious thought to bailing out. Setup a BQM over at https://www.thinkbroadband.com/broadband/monitoring/quality that'll show what's going on with your VM connection. Post a link to a live, shared graph here and we'll see what's happening. Usually needs to run for 24 hours before we can draw reasonable conclusions, but the live graph will continuously update so you can do that immediately.
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