It should be on the Manage Accounts tab when signed in using the primary address for the billing account, see photo. Or you should be able to use the forgotten password link from the sign in page. This is all assuming the address was created as a secondary address with the existing billing account, of course, and is not orphaned.
For the moment, forget about setting up your new phone. Let's determine whether your address is orphaned. Does anything in this link make you think it is orphaned? I am hoping it is just that you are unfamiliar with the VM system!
Have you signed in to myvirginmedia billing account with the primary email address on a web browser? What device/which browser are you doing this on? Have you signed out completely on that web browser so you can sign in cleanly. Try clearing the cache and cookies, or use a different browser.
What can you see on the My Profile tab, what shows on the Manage Accounts tab? Don't give the actual full address, just a general description. In the photos below, it is the primary address showing under the rainbow (MY PROFILE tab, scroll down to MY SERVICES), and secondary addresses on the Manage accounts tab.
If you try to sign in to virgin webmail using the problem email address, what happens if you click Forgotten your password? A secondary user should be able to reset their own password, a primary user can reset their own, or others via the myvirginmedia page. You may need to enter the answer to the security question in all capitals.
If all else fails, a member of the Forum Team (VM employees) should be able to help. They will probably require contact with your wife, the main account holder. They will reach this thread in due course and assist if you reply to my questions above. Good luck.
Surprisingly I phoned this morning and was answered in a few minutes, after some confusion with the agent who answered about a security question i managed to get him to look into this, my Email address wasn't showing on the system but he managed to find it and give me a password to be able to open it on my new phone so all is good now.
But you need to address the issue of whether your email address and mailbox is attached to a billing account with current VM broadband service. If not attached, they are subject to deletion at any time without warning when VM discover and do purges of orphaned addresses. Please let the forum staff have a look to reassure you against future trouble.
It isn't an email address linked to your mother's VM account, is it?
I'm assuming the agent has linked my Email to the main account now as they told me to use the same password as the main account to login.
I suppose we should now change that password as the agent now knows what it is. ??
The way I understand it, email addresses are created within a billing account. The primary address is created as the username for the single sign on system and can never be deleted unless the account is closed. Secondary addresses (up to 9 at one time) stick with the primary address forever. They can't be swapped or moved to a different account, although they can be deleted. There is a Move & Transfer process for customers who move house and set up a new VM account in the same name. The whole profile is moved to the new account, and any addresses created on the new account are deleted forever.
I still think you should let a Forum Team member check all is well.
Yes, you should update all your passwords now, and it is a good time to review security.